Broken and beautiful.

Dear friend,
A year ago today I met you.   Terrified as I saw your sweet little body laying in a hospital bed, wondering how in the world I was going to be capable enough to care for you, yet reminded of the conversation I had with God just 3 weeks before.

It was a rainy day, I had dropped Isaac off at school and was heading to a job that I honestly dreaded.   It had been 3 long months since our precious little friend "meatloaf" had left our home.   Through sobs I cried out to God begging him to bless us with another friend.   A week later  I got a text from a  friend asking me to pray for a sweet baby in desperate need of prayers.   10 days later I met you.

You were broken, yet beautiful.   

The drive home was nothing short of eventful as we drove around St. Louis for 3 hours trying to find a pharmacy that had your special medication.  You were quiet and content.   You looked at us with a look I will never forget, almost like you knew how terrified I was to be called to care for you.   That day, a year ago, our adventure began.   It hasn't been easy, I wouldn't be honest if I didn't say there were days when I wasn't sure if I was the right person to care for you or I was reminded by others that I wasn't qualified to care for you... and there were many conversations between Dave and I where we asked ourselves, "can we keep doing this?".    There were months where you were expressionless and the hours of time and tears I invested in you, were not reciprocated, yet there was always this hope and determination to keep pushing through.   A reminder, that God brought you to us for a reason.

Those weeks, turned into months and anthills turned into mountains where your sweet life seemed hopeless.  There were countless hours in doctor's offices where we were hit with bad news after more bad news and here we are sweet friend, a year later, and you are simply a miracle.

You've taught me more than you will probably ever know.  You've taught me to be a fighter and to be tough.   You've taught me to be selfless.   You've taught me that sleep is not a necessity, rather an amenity.   Your smile melts my heart and your uh-oh's never get old.  

You are going to break my heart some day but you, my sweet friend,  you are so worth it.    I wouldn't trade this last year for anything and am blessed that God called me to love on you.

Happy Friend-aversary friend!